Day 3 - 7 Day Messy Progress Challenge

 

DAY 3: FACE THE SHAME, DON’T FEED IT 

DAY 3 PUMPUP! 

Yesterday we celebrated micro victories. Today we’re going to face the sneakiest recovery saboteur: shame. Shame is the accelerant when fear and failure show up. Shame whispers that you’re broken, damaged goods. You don’t deserve happiness. You’ll never ____________ enough. 

Here we’ve named shame and we’re refusing to let it drive our actions. Today we face shame head on. Even a little bit. That’s messy brave progress. 

DAY 3 REFLECTION: Post below! (If you’re comfortable) 

Share an example of shame trying to creep in today (or this week). What was said to you? How did you react? Or how could you react next time? Remember: no shame here. If deep isn’t happening, that’s okay. Naming it out loud here is victory enough. Comment on two other posts as well. 

DAY 3 JOURNAL PROMPT: When has shame recently tried to convince you to give up on yourself? What words did shame specifically use? What were you afraid if those words were true?

Take a moment and write yourself a little love letter. If someone you cared about said those things about themselves what would you say to them? Allow yourself to credit for facing shame today (even if you felt defeated). Write: I am not my shame. I am the person who showed up today.

_______ is bigger than my shame. 

DAY 3 MINDFULNESS PRACTICE: Spend 5-7 minutes practicing RAIN: 

Recognize the shame. Feel it in your body or mind appearing

Allow the shame to exist without pushing it away.

Investigate with love- What are you scared of? What old story are you believing about yourself?

Nurture yourself as you would someone you loved.

Get comfy, close your eyes, and take your time working through whatever shame is present using RAIN.

OPTIONAL EXERCISE: 

RAIN guided meditation on healing shame with Tara Brach: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlyuGSwaZQ8

REAL TALK FROM A COACH WHO’VE BEEN THERE…

James felt like there was a silent war raging inside of him and no one else seemed to notice. Raised in a household where your lips are sewn shut if there was drama and emotions were hidden behind stern faces and tight smiles. James kept his emotions to himself so well that by the time he realized something was off. By 21 years old, drinking numbed him out enough that he liked the feeling. At first… 

Then it became too much. Wake up. Drink some more. rinse, repeat. He spent every day fighting the internal voice that shouted he was damaged beyond repair and incapable of love or being loved again. He became a professional secret holder and learned how to plaster on a fake smile and keep the jokes coming. Whatever was happening inside, stay hooked up on the outside.

The first time James spoke the words “I am ashamed.” Wasn’t anywhere near a moment of enlightenment at a mountaintop. It was sitting in circle holding someone’s shook hand, voice cracking, tears fighting to be hidden because crying felt like weakness. The words ripped through his throat and every part of him wanted to curl up in shame over spilling out so much pain. Vulnerability felt dangerous. But saying those words aloud left him terrified, ripped open, and completely exposed.

What he said next to nobody but himself would be the start of facing his shame instead of letting shame face him. I am not my shame. I am the person who loved hard enough to feel this pain.

Work is hard. Healing even harder. Reach out anytime. 

COACHES GETTING REAL: 

Today we face shame. It feels yucky and uncomfortable, but it won’t feed itself if we shine some light. Reach out today if shame is looming large or if you’re just here to cheer someone else on. We can do this together. 

Community Growth Wins: 

Comment on two other people’s posts. 

Tag one friend who might be struggling with shame or guilt today. https://www.skool.com/progress-is-progress-coaching-3648 

Journal any learning in your Tiny Wins + Lessons notebook.

Tomorrow we’ll learn how to accept setbacks without shame hijacking our emotions again. Day 4 

Day 2 of the 7 Day challenge

 

🌱 DAY 2: Embrace Tiny Progress 🌱

If yesterday was about defining what “progress” feels like in recovery… Today is all about those tiny wins. You know the ones. Progress that feels nothing like progress. Making your bed. Taking a deep breath instead of yelling. Sending that text when you wanted to crawl in bed and hide. Or even waking up and choosing to stay in the game another day.

Those small wins aren’t “nothing.” They are days, weeks, months of tiny good decisions adding up while no one was looking. Celebrating them re-wires your brain, improves motivation, and starves that shame dragon. So own it.

---

Today’s Share:
Post one teeny tiny win from yesterday or the day before. It can be as small as “I drank a glass of water instead of drinking a bottle of wine.” “I got out of bed when I wanted to stay hidden.” “I paused before reacting.” But for real—no “nothing” wins today.

Reply to at least 2 people with words of encouragement. This is how we build community.

---

Journal:
Write out a list of as many tiny wins from yesterday or today as you can think of. Seriously—I mean EVERYTHING. Even the stuff you feel silly about. Notice what it feels like in your body/mind when you allow yourself to recognize these as actual progress.

How does the idea of celebrating small wins change your inner dialogue? Your motivation?

---

Mindfulness Exercise (5 minutes):

• Find a notebook or pull up the notes app on your phone.
• Write down 3 tiny wins from today (or yesterday!). Did you brush your teeth today when you felt like crap? That’s a win!
• Close your eyes if you’re comfortable and take two deep breaths for each thing you wrote down. Allow yourself to FEEL that win.
• Finish by telling yourself, out loud or in your mind: “These small steps count. I am doing something.”

---

Optional Watch:
Nothing epic happens overnight (video)

---

Trigger Warning/Recovery Story:
Growing up, Maria always strived to be perfect. As a mom, she found herself constantly torn between endless distractions of motherhood and cravings for an addiction she fought tooth and nail to keep hidden. Between school runs and cleaning up endless Cheerios off the floor, she managed to smile and pretend like it was all so easy. What she didn’t let on was nights spent gulping down her “medicine” like water. She never liked to think about the why. She only knew that when night fell, bottles got her through the darkness.

Staring down at her sleeping babies, she’d berate herself daily. How could she let herself become this monster? Nobody would love her like that. What kind of mom forgets to take care of herself? She was living a double life. Or so she thought. Sure, her addiction wasn’t televised like some cinematic overdose tale… but it was hers. It was devouring her quietly, piece by hopeless piece.

It had now been three weeks since she last reached out to her sponsor. She knew she should’ve called… but something about admitting her shame aloud made it 100x worse. That night she sat on the phone for what felt like hours. Tears streaming down her face, shaking hands tossing the phone down and picking it right back up again. She wasn’t ready. She hated herself. She wasn’t fixed. But fuck it, she was tired.

“Hello?” She said, whisper-shaky into the phone, praying she didn’t sound as broken as she felt.

That was progress. Baby steps. Right? That was her one tiny moment of weakness. And that was enough for someone to reach out and offer support. We celebrate that kind of progress here.

---

Disclaimer:
If you need support or want to share your story, please reach out to me anytime. I am happy to offer resources or talk. For now, post your tiny win below, encourage a fellow member, and remember you are not alone in this.

---

Actions to grow this community:

• Reply to at least 2 other posts. You never know who needs to hear your encouraging words TODAY.
• Message 1 person who either needs this group to help them through recovery OR knows someone in recovery, and send them the link to this post (community link: https://www.skool.com/progress-is-progress-coaching-3648). Allow me to help however I can.
• Add today’s wins to your “Tiny Wins + Lessons” Notebook.

See you bright and early for Day 3—Shame without letting it run your life!

Weaponized Self-Talk Your Daily Dose of Don’t Give a Fuck

August 25, 2026

Trigger:
You’re working, scrolling, eating, or cleaning like it’s a full-time job just to avoid sitting with yourself.

Rewrite:
Busyness is not the same as progress. Numbing with “productive” habits is still numbing. You already know how to survive. Now practice being present.

The Move:
Catch yourself mid-escape once today and pause for sixty seconds. Breathe. Notice you’re still here.

Progress is progress — mile or millimeter.

Weaponized Self-Talk: Your Daily Dose of Don’t Give a F*ck

 Weaponized Self-Talk: Your Daily Dose of Don’t Give a F*ck

August 24, 2026

Trigger:
Parenting (or showing up for family) while carrying your own recovery feels like running two full-time jobs with zero backup.

Rewrite:
You do not have to be a perfect parent or partner to be a good one. Showing up imperfectly is still showing up. Your kids and people need the real you, not the exhausted performance.

The Move:
Do one small thing today that is just for you—even five minutes—without guilt or explanation.

Progress is progress — mile or millimeter.

7 Day Messy Progress Challenge

 

🌱 Day 1: Welcome & Set Intentions 🌱

Hey, it’s Belle.

This week is about showing up for your messy progress—no filters, no shame, no pretending. If you’re here, you or someone you love knows how brutal addiction and recovery can be. But damn it, progress counts, no matter how small or ugly.

For the next 7 days, we’ll keep it real, focus on tiny wins, and leave shame behind. This is not about perfection; it’s about showing up as you are. Progress is Progress—and you’re already proving it by being here.

Today’s Reflection:
Drop a word, phrase, or quick thought. What’s the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “progress”? Tag someone if their reply resonates.

Journal Prompt:
Think about the last time you felt truly stuck—shame, fear, or self-doubt holding you hostage. What did that feel like in your body? What thoughts flooded your mind? Then, what would you say to yourself if you were your own best friend?

Mindfulness Practice (5 minutes):
Sit comfortably and close your eyes if it feels okay. Take deep breaths and bring to mind any shame or guilt you’re carrying. Breathe in the shame. Breathe out kindness and compassion. Silently repeat twice: “I am not my shame. I am showing up anyway.” Notice how you feel.

Optional Resource:
Tara Brach’s guided meditation on Healing Shame (compassionate and grounding):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlyuGSwaZQ8

Real Talk Case Story:
Terry’s story isn’t neat or clean. It’s a mess of broken promises he made to himself, nights spent lying awake haunted by his own mistakes, and mornings he wanted to disappear instead of face the world. For five years, meth was his escape and his prison all at once—a cruel trick that stole his sense of worth, tore him from his kids, and left him isolated in a fog of shame so thick he thought it might smother him forever.

One morning, after a night that felt like the end, Terry stared at his reflection and didn’t even recognize the man looking back. The tired eyes, the hollowed cheeks, the weight of every missed birthday, every lost smile—they pressed in tight, threatening to break whatever tiny ember of hope he still clung to. But somehow, with trembling legs and a heart screaming against itself, Terry made a choice. He walked into his first sober meeting. Not because he was cured, not because he had it all figured out, but because maybe, just maybe, this brokenness wasn’t the end of his story.

His hands shook so badly he couldn’t hold the coffee cup steady. He wanted to turn around at the door, run back to the blur of forgetfulness that felt like a safer place. But he stayed. He showed up, raw and ashamed. In that room, surrounded by strangers who somehow understood his shame without judgment, Terry felt a crack in his armor. No one handed him a magic fix or told him he was “fixed” now. Instead, they shared their own messes, their own dirty, beautiful, complicated roads forward. And in the quiet moments, something shifted—a tiny flicker of possibility that maybe progress didn’t have to look perfect. Maybe showing up was enough for now.

That shaky first step wasn’t a victory lap. It was survival. It was courage. It was a testament to the fierce, messy, stubborn fight inside Terry that refused to quit. And that’s what real progress looks like.

Need help or want to share?
Drop your reflection below and reply to at least two others with encouragement. This is your no-shame zone.

Community Growth Actions:

• Reply to at least two posts today.
• Invite one person struggling (or supporting someone in recovery) to join us. Share the link: https://www.skool.com/progress-is-progress-coaching-3648
• Start a simple “Tiny Wins + Lessons Notebook” (notes app or journal)—we’ll build on it all week.

See you tomorrow for Day 2—celebrating the tiny wins that actually matter.

Weaponized Self-Talk: Your Daily Dose of Don’t Give a F*ck

 Weaponized Self-Talk: Your Daily Dose of Don’t Give a F*ck

August 23, 2026
Trigger:
You’re still waiting for some external proof that you’ve “earned” the right to feel okay or take up space.

Rewrite:
There is no committee. No certificate. No finish line where someone hands you permission. You already have it. Use it.

The Move:
Claim one thing today—space, rest, an opinion, a boundary—without asking if you’re allowed.

Progress is progress — mile or millimeter.

 

Process Addictions After Substance Recovery: When the Phone, Food, Work, or Relationships Become the New Drug

Belinda Morey BS, CSAC

Owner & Clinician @ Progress is Progress LLC | Empowering Recovery Journeys w/Multifaceted Positions & Projects

August 22, 2026

I got sober from meth and thought the hard part was over.

I was wrong.

The substances left. The sleep came back. I started showing up. And then, almost quietly, something else slid into the empty space. The phone at 2 a.m. Food as comfort and punishment. Work that never let me stop. Relationships that felt like oxygen and quicksand at the same time. These are process addictions. They don’t come in a bag or a bottle. They hijack the same reward system the drugs once owned. And for a lot of us, they were already there — the quieter earthquake running underneath the louder storm. I know because it happened to me. Sobriety didn’t erase the part of me that still reached for escape, numbness, or intensity. It just forced that part to get creative.

Here’s where we’re going today: Why this happens after you get sober. What it actually looks like in real life. And six practical ways to work with it without shame or perfectionism. Your nervous system spent years learning that certain chemicals could shut off pain, boredom, loneliness, or overwhelm fast. When those chemicals leave, the system still looks for a quick way to regulate. Process addictions offer a similar hit — dopamine, temporary relief, a sense of control — without the same obvious consequences at first.

They often look acceptable on the outside.

“At least she’s working, not drinking.” “Look how much weight he lost now that he’s sober.” “The chaos stopped… now she just never leaves the house.”

Underneath is the same core drive: I don’t want to feel what I’m feeling right now, so I’ll do _______ instead.

This is survival, not weakness. Your brain is doing what it was trained to do.

Here’s what it looks like day to day:

Phone / Screens Reaching for it the second discomfort shows up. Losing hours. Using it so you don’t have to sit with yourself or have the hard conversation.

Food Eating or restricting to soothe, punish, or numb. The fridge or the drive-thru becomes the new dealer.

Work / Productivity Never slowing down. Exhausting yourself to prove your worth. Saying yes to everything so you never have to be alone with your thoughts.

Relationships Falling hard and fast. People-pleasing. Trying to fix or rescue someone else so you don’t have to feel your own emptiness or fear of abandonment.

Others Shopping. Gambling. Exercise that becomes compulsion. Sex. Needing control. Endless self-improvement that never lets you rest.

Most of these start looking harmless. They become a problem when the behavior is the primary way you regulate emotion — and when it starts creating more pain than it relieves.

There is no magic worksheet that fixes this for everyone. What works is honesty, experimentation, and tools that actually fit your nervous system.

1. Name it without shame When you catch yourself mid-behavior, pause and say: “This is my nervous system looking for regulation.” Just naming it creates a little distance.

2. The 10-Minute Delay Experiment When the urge hits, set a timer for 10 minutes and do anything else. You’re not saying “never again.” You’re practicing choice. Most urges lose intensity if you can wait them out.

3. Ask the Real Question Instead of “How do I stop this?”, try: “What am I actually needing right now that this behavior is trying to give me?” Rest? Connection? Distraction? Control? Once you know the need, you can experiment with meeting it differently.

4. Create Small Friction Make the automatic behavior slightly harder. Phone in another room. No work apps after a certain hour. Tiny obstacles create space for a different choice.

5. Build a Personal “Good Enough” Menu List 5–7 things that give even a little of the same relief. Keep the list visible. When the urge hits, pick one. It doesn’t have to be profound — it just has to interrupt the automatic reach.

6. Track Patterns, Not Perfection Notice when the urge gets loudest and what usually comes right before it. You’re gathering data, not keeping score.

The goal is not to become someone who never reaches for comfort. The goal is more choice, more awareness, and less damage over time.

If process addictions showed up (or got louder) after you got sober, it does not mean you failed at recovery. It means recovery is revealing the next layer. A lot of us only discover these patterns once the bigger chemical storm settles. That is normal. That is human. You already proved you can change your relationship with something powerful. The same capacity exists here. It just takes the same honesty, the same willingness to experiment, and the same refusal to let shame run the show.

You don’t have to figure it out perfectly. You just have to keep paying attention and adjusting as you go.

Progress is progress.

— Belle